Poor Pheidippides gets a raw deal. You probably know the guy even if you don’t know the name, or how to pronounce it, or spell it. The legend goes that in 490 B.C., the Athenians (Greeks) beat the Persians in a major battle at Marathon. Apparently an impatient people, the Greeks sent P-Dippi running - in the summer heat - to Athens to announce the triumph. Upon arrival, he exclaimed, ‘Victory’ or something similarly upbeat, then collapsed dead. He gets a raw deal because according to Greek historian Herodotus, P-Dips actually ran as much as 153 miles in two days before the battle to ask Sparta for help, and he lived. Somehow, through a millennia-long game of Telephone, the distance was shortened to 26ish miles, AND he dropped dead. Raw deal, great story.
Despite many other viable methods of transportation, and the apocryphal risk of instant death, people love running. And despite the cramps and wheezing you may experience on your first few outings, thanks to the efficient cooling mechanism of sweating, we are actually well-adapted for it. We used to hunt animals who could run much faster than ourselves just by chasing after them for a couple days, like an extremely determined and fit horror movie villain. So, whether you want to run down some game for old times’ sake, complete a marathon, or just have a morning run so you can live with yourself after having ordered that amazing tiramisu last night, get out there and run!
GETTING STARTED
If your idea of running is sprinting to the fridge during commercial breaks, you could probably use a motivating and instructional article about how to start and keep running. Advice is included on shoes, wearing polyester instead of cotton, and on how you’ll walk more than you’ll run in the beginning. Advice on how to escape the wildlife just ACHING to eat a runner is not included and a major oversight.
Having said that, if your motivation is to be able to run fast enough to escape a predator, you’re in for a rude awakening. Peter Allison entertainingly explains why exactly in Whatever You Do, Don’t Run.
Have you been reluctant to start running because it will take time away from your art? With GPS enabled on smart devices, you can do a ‘draw run’. Perhaps you will make drawings expressing the joy of the body in motion, a complex geometric pattern, or perhaps, like Claire, you will draw mostly genitals.
Some people like to run without gadgets, preferring to take a moment to disconnect in an all too-connected World. Those weirdos clearly don’t have the right running app. Read this roundup of apps to find which is right for you.
Speaking of apps, one’s been created to help choose exactly the right music for your run, even matching the tempo of your stride. They guarantee that no Carpenters songs will show up.
Running will keep you healthy and its popularity allows the opportunity to socialize. But most important, in a post apocalyptic world where running is the only way to escape roving hordes of zombies, wouldn’t you like to be the most fleet of foot? Of course you would. So start practicing immediately for this inevitability.
